From a 4th Generation Matchmaker: Three Misconceptions About Greek Sperm: How You’re Sabotaging Yourself Looking for the Perfect Man

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I’ve been a professional matchmaker for eight years, and I have interviewed thousands of people about their dating histories and relationship endeavors. Owning one of the most respected matchmaking firms in the country, you end up working and representing people of diverse backgrounds – culturally, socio-economically, and even politically. As one of the few matchmakers that actually happens to be Greek, I attract many Greek singles every week into my service. (I also have a Masters in Global Affairs & Economics, which may explain why more than half my clientele either works at the UN or a hedge fund. Go figure!)

Nonetheless, every month, I interview Greek ladies all looking for one thing: A Greek Man. Beautiful, smart, exceptional Greek women come to me, and they tell me that they ONLY want to date Greek, even if it means they have to freeze their eggs as they hold out for the Perfect Greek Man. I find this crazy. They’re putting Greek sperm on a pedestal!

Below are the three misconceptions about Greek sperm that sabotage Greek women from the perfect man and their happily ever after:

1) Greek sperm holds magical powers.

Ask someone why they want to date Greek (in the Diaspora), and they’ll say one of two answers, if not both: “They will have the same family values as me!” and “I hate having to explain Greek culture quirks all the time.” What I hear? Greek sperm is magic! It has the power to make babies that will be embraced with family orientedness, a complicated family structure of love, and dyed red eggs around a lamb spit.

I’m not sure why some people believe that Greek culture has the monopoly on family values. There are plenty of Southern European and even Middle Eastern cultures that resemble the Greek family dynamic. My uncle re-married a Lebanese woman, who’s Orthodox Christian too, and excluding the fact that my life has more hummus and pistachios than before, you would think she was Greek! Her family is loud and loving. We even belly danced at their wedding to music I could have sworn was Greek, but instead Arabic. I felt right at home!

Our Greek culture quirks like cracking red eggs and lamb spits at Easter, our relationship with the “koinotita” or our local Greek community, the absolute need to go to Greece every summer, our non-negotiable stance on our future children to go to Greek school and Greek Dance and GOYA… (I could go on. We are a weird bunch!) Anyway, all of these conversations happen once. That’s it. Welcome to an adult relationship. Even non-Greeks can be attentive when you speak about things you are passionate about. Unless you’re bringing up these topics in a defensive manner, chances are that a man who dates a Greek woman is probably going to be absolutely fine with embracing these kind of passions that give a sense of structure.

There are countless men out there just absolutely ready to love a Greek woman and become Philhellenes. Did the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding teach you nothing!? Ian got baptized for Toula! You, too, can find an Ian!

2) Greek sperm is ready and able to fertilize you!

Look, if you really, really, really want to have kids, and you’re over 35, and you’re STILL holding out for the perfect Greek Man with his Greek sperm, you’re going to need to re-think your strategy. If you’re dead set on it, just move to Greece! At least anyone you date there will likely, by default, be Greek!

However, if you’re inching towards your late 30’s, you need to become WAY more open minded on your Greek preference. What’s the point of looking for Greek sperm if you don’t have access to it, or worse – when you do, you can’t even use it?

“Shut up, Maria. I’m 38. I still have years left!” Maybe. However, in my professional experience, a whole lot of men in their late 30s and early 40s don’t want to meet women over 35. All I’m saying is – be open minded! Don’t expect others to be.

3) All Greek sperm is GREAT sperm.

It’s not, and I say this as someone who ended up with a Greek man. (Before you ask, yes, we technically met through my business. His best friend is one of my employees. We met at a bar. #OldSchool) I was open minded during my single years. I dated a German guy, an Irish guy, and a British guy before him, so falling in love with a Greek man was shocking to my parents. I feel very lucky to be with the man I am with, not because he’s Greek, but because he’s thoughtful, smart, dependable, caring, attentive, can handle my crazy (and my success), and would never think once to hurt me.

If it sounds like I’m bragging, it’s because I sort of am. It’s not because he’s Greek, but because he’s got everything I was looking for as the future father of my children; children that would have ended up in Greek school and Greek Dance and GOYA because they’d have me as their mother, regardless of who I picked as a father for them.

Basically, what I’m trying to say is this: Just because a man is Greek doesn’t mean he is going to be a great boyfriend, a great husband, or a great father to your kids. I have met countless women in the last decade dead set on finding a Greek man that they completely ignore all the red flags on display of shitty character and lack of integrity because they want that Greek sperm. Some end up divorced, others in loveless marriages.

If you date the person for their character, with your ovaries in mind, you’ll pick a better life partner. If fate should have it, he may be Greek too. It’s not the end of the world if he’s not, because… you’ll be happy! You’ve met the perfect man for you. (Screw your parents’ overbearing/crazy expectations.) If you choose right, he’ll learn to break plates like the rest of us.

 

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About Maria Avgitidis:

Maria Avgitidis is a fourth generation matchmaker and the Founder of Agape Match, one of the leading modern matchmaking firms in the United States. With over eight years of matchmaking and date coaching experience, she leads Agape Match in producing dating solutions and expert relationship advice. Maria’s dating expertise has been featured in numerous publications, including CNN, Esquire, Fast Company, Women’s Health, Reuters, CBS and many others. Her success as a matchmaker has gained national recognition and awarded best matchmaking service in New York City by CBS News. She was also awarded as a finalist for most innovative company and best dating site design at the 2012 and 2015 iDate Awards and best matchmaker at the 2012, 2013, and 2014 iDate Awards.


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